Sad Panthers Fan: Just when I thought I was out, they ... pushed me away again

By Lauren Brownlow, WRALSportsFan columnist/reporter

Yes, I took a break from the Carolina Panthers.

There have been times over the years where I'd done that on the occasional week when we had other plans, because my life doesn't revolve around the team. But I had never been out for as long as I was this year.

I almost made it through Week 5, but when things went south early against the 49ers I was out. I realized I had to take a break from this team, if for no other reason than my own mental health. This team wasn't going anywhere, and it was mostly just a sad viewing experience to be honest. The Falcons OT loss I heard about but missed almost got me back, but then the Panthers were blown out by the Rams and I was good. The dominating win over the Buccaneers was yet more temptation, but I saw a movie with my kid that day.

That's a lot of what I've been doing, frankly — seeing movies, by myself or with my kid. And what better time than a matinee, right? Then I get home from the movie, buzzing off of a usually enjoyable cinematic experience, and do I really want to throw trash on my television? No. And so I didn't. I spent more time with my son and I think we're both better for it.

One thing the long COVID experience has taught me is to put myself and my family first as often as I can, and that I have to do things that feel good to me rather than do things out of sheer obligation. Life is too short. And I don't have an obligation to care about a franchise that doesn't care about me or my fellow fans.

After consecutive wins over the Seahawks (on the road!) and the Broncos, though? I was ready to open my heart again.

If you follow me on Twitter or read me here, you already know that my philosophy has always been tank for draft picks when the season goes south. Every useless win the Panthers used to stack up near the end of a season would enrage me. They once had a win cost them TEN draft spots. Just, why? For what?

But this year? This year was different.

I like Steve Wilks, and have for a long time. When he was named interim coach, though, I wasn't immediately back in because I watched owner David Tepper's press conference. I have very little confidence in his decision-making, and hearing him say an African-American head coach being put in the interim spot with a roster like this would have to do an amazing job to get the head coaching position? It infuriated me beyond belief, and it would have been too sad for me to watch the rest of the season play out as it inevitably would. Poorly.

But Wilks did a strange thing. He got this team to buy in and believe. They believed in him, believed that unlike his predecessor, he knew what he was doing and would put them in the best position to win football games.

They may have liked Matt Rhule as a person just fine, but it was clear the majority of them didn't feel that way about him. And why would they? They have eyes, just like most of us.

Wilks is a man who has a ton of experience, and he has been around this franchise a long time. The good times and the bad. He willingly came back here a year ago likely knowing he would be in this exact situation. But he cares about the franchise and the Charlotte area in a very genuine way. Fans and players could both see that. Considering Tepper seems to not care much about either, it would make sense that that wouldn't matter to him.

But it matters to fans. It matters to me. It's a big reason the fans came to love Cam Newton so much. He gave so much back to Charlotte during his time there, both on and off the field. And his love was genuine. Even his naysayers largely agreed on that. It felt good to be wanted by a truly great player, you know? We love this team, and so does he! It was something that the franchise hasn't experienced all that often.

Jerry Richardson was not a good human being, but he did genuinely care about this area as owner of the team. He saw that kind of thing, and it mattered to him. Maybe Jerry would have also been fooled by Rhule's corporate buzzword motivational speeches, but somehow I doubt it.

So the reason that this year and this year alone I made an exception for my "tank for a better pick" policy was because I wanted to give Tepper no choice. He'd have to give Wilks the job. And if the Panthers had beaten the Steelers, they would have not only won their third straight game, but they would have also been in great position for a playoff spot.

Now? Now they have to win out, and Tepper will have his justification to not keep Wilks. He got my heart back into it, he got this team's heart back into it, and come the end of the season, he'll likely be out. And the fans will all just have to pray that Tepper doesn't fall for another bad college coach or take another NFL retread who has failed and failed.

That's why I stopped watching to begin with, honestly. And it's what has made watching this team so unpleasant since Newton left, too, aside for his brief stint back with the team. Who is left in a position of power in this franchise who genuinely cares about it? I'm sure there are plenty of people, but do they have more power than Tepper? Will they actually find a franchise quarterback, or continue to flail around?

When Tepper drove the return of Newton to Charlotte, I honestly had faith that he knew what he was doing. Since then, that faith has all but evaporated as he continued to double down on Rhule just because he'd been silly enough to give him an exorbitantly long contract, even as it was clear he was not the guy like midway through last season and certainly by the end.

And the press conference he had this year after Rhule was fired was sloppy and arrogant and at times, ignorant. This franchise has never experienced winning? Um, Google is your friend, my dude. It has. And while it hasn't put together back-to-back winning seasons, it also hasn't looked as bad as it has under you for as long as it has in quite some time. So you made that kind of history, I guess. Certainly not the winning kind, not yet. So who are you to get up there and preach to us as if we should be grateful for the changes you say you are trying to make, but haven't come close to making yet?

That press conference definitely made me question his decision-making abilities, but it also made it even clearer that he doesn't understand or care about this area or its franchise. And he doesn't really care to understand. So what hope is there? I guess at this point, it's that he hands the decision-making reins to, you know, a general manager. But that's a big if at this point.

If he surprises me and hires Wilks, I'll be able to give my whole heart again instead of just watching when I can. Or even if he gives up some power. But until and unless he does that, I have to believe that things will continue to be bad.

DID IT HAVE TO BE THE STEELERS, THOUGH?

David Tepper's old team, the one that so many of its born-and-raised Pittsburgh residents travel every week nationwide to follow closely no matter their record (PLEASE NOTE MY HEAVY SARCASM BECAUSE THEY LIVE HERE), the one that willingly and happily employed and propped up Ben Roethlisberger for years? Yeah, I don't care for them.

I like Steelers' fans just fine. My cousin, who spent most of his life here and in Arizona, grew up a Steelers' fan and stayed that way. There are still plenty of people in this state that were born before 1995, people that didn't want to choose the Washington Commanders or the Atlanta Falcons to follow (most chose the Commanders anyway). So they adopted any team they liked because they had that luxury, and they stuck with them.

I don't like how announcers always insist they travel well to games at opposing venues. Pittsburgh seems like a lovely enough city, but I know plenty of people here and elsewhere around the south that have migrated down to join the rest of us to know that a lot of people in the stands here and in Atlanta and elsewhere? THEY LIVE THERE.

Do some of them travel to enjoy games from Pittsburgh? Sure! And I'm sure it's a not-insignificant number! The Panthers have a traveling group of fans too, Roaring Riot, and they have made their presence loudly known at games from time to time. But the reason Steelers' fans outnumber the home team sometimes is because they live here! And that's fine! We love y'all! I'm just saying, context is important. And announcers should know better.

I even like their head coach, Mike Tomlin. He's a no-nonsense dude that still manages to treat his players like humans, and he's overall done a fantastic job there over a long time period, which is not easy to do in today's NFL.

But I do not like the Steelers.

And so to potentially lose a chance for a playoff spot that would have saved Wilks' job to a team that I don't like while Bank of America Stadium was filled with Terrible Towels and Steelers' chants? Ugh. Throw a little more salt inn my gaping wound, please.

THE NFC COASTAL

Remember how every single year, no matter how good or bad the teams in the Coastal were every year, everyone acted like all the teams in it were hot garbage? Remember how sometimes that was actually true, and we all openly rooted for a Coastal-wide tie? Or maybe that was just me. Anyway ....

Speaking of the NFC Coastal ...

SCHADENFREUDE

It's all we have left as Panthers' fans, right? And thankfully after the Panthers' crushing defeat, we got some.

I felt like I knew what would happen when I turned on the Bengals-Bucs game at halftime and the Bucs led 17-3. This was the time when the Bucs would get it together, Tom Brady would magically start playing at a super-high level and they'd be the ones to go on a playoff run and possibly win the Super Bowl again because Tom Brady is the Michael Myers of the NFL. He cannot be killed. Metaphorically.

Tom Brady the person? I won't cast aspersions on who he is because I don't know him and on a human level, I do feel badly for what he is going through, even if he did bring it upon himself by coming out of retirement. When you've played a sport at such a high level for a long time, it's easy to see why you aren't eager to stop.

But Tom Brady, the football player? I am over it. I am done. Please get out of my life and the lives of everyone else tired of watching you. When he retired, I was like, good for him. He had a great career and is one of the best to ever do it. Then he un-retired FORTY DAYS later. Are you kidding me? Whatever.

Anyway, throughout his career, what we've seen is that stretches of poor play from him are short if they happen at all, and if he's down in a game, it always seems inevitable that he'll come back.

I figured I'd give the Bengals a couple of series to make it close. The Bucs turned it over and they got a field goal out of it, then Joe Burrow took what seemed to be a 23-yard sack. When a penalty gave the Bengals a first down, I figured I'd stay in it a little bit longer.

And what happened? It's something as rare as whatever type of eclipse is the rarer one — Brady and his team FELL APART completely. He threw picks. They lost fumbles. It was wild. And while I'm not usually a believer in momentum, the Bengals just kept getting the turnovers and eventually shifted into high gear, if it took them a few times. And Brady fell to 89-1 when holding a lead of 17 or more points, and the Panthers still control their own destiny when it seemed obvious they would not by halftime.

Am I enjoying the Bucs' failure? I mean, a little, most mostly no. Since the early 2000s rivalry fizzled, I've always disliked them the least of any other NFC South opponent. But am I enjoying Brady suddenly being mortal? I don't even know if I enjoy it as much as it just leaves me in sheer awe. I still can't believe this is happening.

Add that in with the hilarious (but unfortunate for former NC State wide receiver Jakobi Meyers) final play to lose the game for the Patriots, and I did a lot of laughing from 5:45 until 7:30. And who doesn't like to laugh?

If you can get through the "oh NO!" and haven't laughed once, we can't be friends.

UP NEXT

Let's keep it simple:

And you know what else is brutal about it? The Lions are this year's most lovable team! EVERYONE else in the football world basically will be rooting for them. I mean, it doesn't matter in the end, but still.

I don't feel very good about the Panthers' chances, obviously. But at least our offensive coordinator likes to wear shorts in near-freezing temperatures. Who needs good play-calling when we have that?

Well, now I feel better.